the karma farmer

Reaping what I sow, which is apparently sarcasm and bacon

Crispy Baked Soy/Ginger Chicken Wings July 26, 2014

Filed under: Just Life,Recipes — Karma Farmer @ 6:08 PM

This recipe is for about 2 1/2 lbs. of chicken wing pieces, which is approximately 20 pieces of combined drummies and flats.  You can easily double it for larger batches.

FOR THE WINGS:

2.5 lbs. chicken wings, drummies and flats separated

1 TBSP. oil

1/2 TBSP. kosher salt

1/2 TBSP. coarse ground black pepper

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Line a baking sheet with aluminum foil (for easiest clean up), and set a wire rack on top of the aluminum foil.

Mix together the wing pieces, oil, salt and pepper in a large bowl.  Place on rack (don’t crowd) and bake for 40 minutes.

At 40 minutes, remove from oven and toss in sauce.  Return to rack and bake an additional 7-15 minutes until caramelized.

Remove from oven and toss in remaining sauce, serve.

 

FOR SAUCE:

2 TBSP. dark soy sauce

1/2 c. water

1/4 c. honey

zest from 1 orange

2 TBSP. ground ginger

2 TBSP. crushed garlic

Combine all sauce ingredients in a small non-stick saucepan and bring to a low boil.  Continue cooking, stirring regularly, until reduced by half.  (About 7 minutes).  Remove from heat and let cool.

Soy Ginger Chicken Wings

 

The Rise & Fall of Squirreltopia July 2, 2014

Filed under: Just Life — Karma Farmer @ 7:26 AM

“You want to get this thing?  Why?”

“It’s a squirrel feeder.  It is SO ME!”

“Seriously?  You don’t think it’s ridiculous?”

Sometimes my husband doesn’t get me at all.  Yes, he found the photos I showed him funny, but that’s where it stopped for him.  Cute idea, good for a chuckle, now let’s move along.  I, conversely, get giddy like a 6 year old walking into Build-A-Bear for the first time when I see amazing stuff.  When we were first married, I would become infatuated with something, then campaign enthusiastically about how it would enrich our lives until he came around to my point of view.  15 years later, I pretty much just ignore his protests and do what I want.

It started innocently enough, with this adorable little squirrel feeder.

chair feeder

 

If you want to feed squirrels dried corn cobs, why in the world wouldn’t you want to see them eating from this chair?  It’s hysterical!  It’s a conversation piece!  It makes me giggle!  I mean, COME ON!  How does anyone not see that?!?

It also requires climbing 15 feet up a ladder to refill the corn cobs, which are then emptied in about 2 hours.  Hysterical, but not practical.

Then I came across the Holy Grail of squirrel feeders which led to the exchange above.

 

And so it begins....

And so it begins….

 

How could he not see the value of this?  I wanted to buy these in bulk, and create a herd of squirrels with horse heads.  You can see that, right?  It would be a laugh a minute!  I could put up a squirrel cam and amuse people all over the globe!  The 2015 Squirrels With Horse Heads Calendar was a no-brainer.  How much better could life get?

 

I decided to start slow before building the squirrel herd, and ordered only one.  I resisted the expedited shipping so as not to appear crazed.  In 3 days I really regretted that decision.  Apparently the options were “Overnight” or “Carrier Pigeon”.  I thought it would NEVER get here!  When it finally arrived, it surpassed all my expectations.  This was the best money I’d ever spent.

IT ARRIVED!

IT ARRIVED!

 

I chose a spot that I could view from several key locations on the main floor, then immediately moved my home office to the dining room so that I wouldn’t miss a single nibble from the squirrels.  It didn’t take long for them to figure out.  It was kind of the best day of my life.

I shall call him "Thunder"

I shall call him “Thunder”

 

 

My husband shook his head. Alot.  You’d never know that he’s the young vibrant one in this relationship.  I get absolutely zero, zilch, nada acknowledgement for bringing this kind of joy into our lives.

The squirrels really took to the feeder.  With gusto.  Even one of our historically small regulars, Stimpy (so named because he has only a nubbin of a tail) was getting a  bit filled out.  I found myself filling up the muzzle of regal steed a couple of times a day.  No problem, as I always have plenty of chow for squirrels and birds and dogs and, apparently, possums (but that’s another story).

Not quite getting the hang of it....

Not quite getting the hang of it….

 

That's better

That’s better

Alas, the real world occasionally interrupts my idyllic life in the Ozarks, and I’m required to fly off to big cities with 12-lane highways and 40 story buildings, all while disguising myself as a business professional.   After a couple of weeks of my dining room table observation deck, duty called, and I obediently flew off to the world of high rises and fancy restaurants.  Four days later, I returned and immediately went to check on my little tree rats.  I’d barely taken a step onto the porch when I saw it.  It took a minute to register, but once I realized what I was seeing, I went on the hunt for my husband.

“WHAT DID YOU DO?!?”  He doesn’t react when I raise my voice, which makes me crazy.  Aren’t men supposed to be afraid of angry women?  He missed that memo.

“Huh?”  Then the light switch went on.  “Oh, yeah, the horse head.  I guess I didn’t refill it enough.  They started chewing it up.  Sorry.”

Sorry?!?  My horse head had been disfigured, and he was SORRY?!?

They ATE Thunder's EAR!

They ATE Thunder’s EAR!

 

I re-doubled my efforts.  Peanuts, cereal, seeds, fruits….it was a gourmet horse head.  Stimpy got fatter, as did the rest of the dray.

What?  You don’t know what a “dray” is?  It’s a group of squirrels, silly.

I set up shop again, this time outdoors on the patio table.  If I left the dogs inside and gave them their space, they continued dining from the equine, and I continued being thoroughly amused.  My husband continued to roll his eyes.  I began making a design blueprint of where other horse head feeders would be positioned.  We had a shot at a cover story in National Geographic….or Redneck Quarterly.

 

Redneck Quarterly

Redneck Quarterly

As my next trip approached, I began to plan.  I was stuffing bread wrappers with squirrel food to make it easier for hubby to keep up.  I gave my grandson, a weekly visitor, pep talks on the fun and frolic of filling the squirrel feeder.  And I talked to Stimpy.  I showed him the blueprint and told him to run like the wind and tell all his little tree rodent friends about Squirreltopia.  I headed to the airport without a care in the world.

Twelve long days later, I came home to find a massacre.  Pieces of plastic horse flesh were strewn across the deck.  It was vile.  Why had they turned on me?  I’d only taken care of them.  Fed them.  Photographed them.  Laughed at them, sure, but not in a mean way.  I tried to make us one big, happy, scurry.  (Yes, that’s another actual word.  What do you think I am, an amateur?)

042

I picked up the pieces of my dream of Squirreltopia, literally and figuratively, and threw them in the garbage.  Ungrateful monsters.  I will never again try to make a cozy, pleasant life for little woodland critters.

It’s a good thing the magazine I read on the plane had an article about attracting toads to your yard.  Do you know you can put HOUSES out for toads?  This is going to be SO GREAT!!!

 

Welcome to Toad Corners!

Welcome to Toad Corners!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just Another Pretty Face June 8, 2014

Filed under: Animals,Just Life — Karma Farmer @ 9:47 AM
Tags: , , , , ,

Is there anything sweeter than Big Sweetie Selfies?!?  These are some of my favorites, including my own big sweeties.

 

PHELFIE!!!!

PHELFIE!!!!

Do you like my new glasses?

Do you like my new glasses?

I had a little lip work done.

I had a little lip work done.

 

Ready to PAR-TAY!!!!

Ready to PAR-TAY!!!!

 

Trying the sophisticated "ears back" style.

Trying the sophisticated “ears back” style.

 

Photobomb!

Photobomb!

 

Sportin' my new 'stache!

Sportin’ my new ‘stache!

This is my good side.

This is my good side.

 

 

The Original Big Sweetie

The Original Big Sweetie

 

 

Why is this just for dogs?

Why is this just for dogs?